Wrong concept...idea...expectations..

Do I have the wrong concepts?
Incorrect ideas?
Immature expectations?
Suddenly, these thoughts came to me...

After a texted conversation with a dear friend..
I was mulling over the thoughts over..
over and over in my head,
even as I go through work, daily routines..

It struck a chord in me..
I could be looking things and thoughts in a different direction of things...
A childish immature way of directions..
Putting myself in misery for so long..

Simply put..
The wrong expectations of things..
Why am I expecting a certain outcome of the situation?
And following it, making things and forcing thoughts in this one direction..
Subjecting myself in endless pain and misery..

Why should I mull and make myself stupid over such immature way of thinking?
What the hell was I even thinking...
Made myself miserable and upset over no good reason..
When I should be concentrating on more important aspects in my life..
Damned fuckery shit of hell...
*laughs* at my own royal stupidity and immaturity of shit hole...

I am saying "Fuck shit to them! and stop wasting my time on these goddamned expectations!"
There...I think this is the end of it..
Whatever it is, it will be whatever it is..
So be it..
I am not going go there further anymore...
Just so not me...

Postrema huius exitum goddamned fuckery...

~ M. Y. ~
September 19th 2013

Thanks, dear friend!

vita..

Suddenly had the urge to go back and see somethings..
things from the past..
the fear is still there..
the sadness is still there..
but seems like the pain is not so much anymore..
maybe I have grown older and wiser..

Somehow the past does not seem to be so painful anymore..
sadness still lingers, but all is good..
I guess everything is finally looking good..
keeping my fingers cross and hope for the best..

I am not sure if everything will be great from now on..
but I hope it will be..
I will try to be my best once again..
not a declaration..
just a promise to myself..
a hope for myself..